It’s actually not that difficult for relationships to continue happily and smoothly. The success of the relationship between men and women, which is based on a complex structure and delicate balances, is only possible by following some simple but important rules recommended. Almost everyone often wonders how healthy their relationship is. Magazines are tested, compared with friends, and relationships are always discussed in tea conversations. However, people who live in a relationship already know how healthy or not a relationship is. The unhappiness, uneasiness, disagreements, conflict and anxieties felt indicate how “sick” the relationship is. Losing the “me” and “you” in the relationship is the most important factor that infects the relationship. I and those who cannot be you cannot form the healthy “we”.
- Can you easily share your feelings and thoughts on every subject?
- Do you share the work of the house and your responsibilities fairly with your partner?
- Do you spend time alone? Are you eager for this? Do you enjoy your time?
- Does your sexual life satisfy you?
- Do you have individual interests and hobbies? Do you devote enough time to these?
- Do you have a social life independent of your partner?
- When a problem is encountered, can you come up with a common solution?
- Do you have short and / or long term common goals with your partner?
- In the absence of your partner, do you miss him or feel good around him?
- Do you accept and respect that each other has a private privacy from each other?
Expert Psychologist Selin Karabulut made 6 suggestions for a healthy relationship.
Specialist Psychologist Selin Karabulut, who said that a healthy relationship is a relationship where both sides are happy and peaceful, their needs such as love, love, support, appreciation, social and sexual needs are met and they can be “us” without losing their own self If a healthy individual wants, then love, respect and tolerance will come naturally. Even if there are disagreements, since such a relationship is built on the foundations of love and respect, the parties’ ability to cope with existing problems more easily improves ”. Karabulut listed her healthy relationship suggestions as follows:
We are all different and rich in our differences. Acknowledging this from the beginning in a relationship, recognizing space for our differences both strengthens the relationship and makes it last longer.
Do not heed the statements such as “The woman has the power at home and the man has the power outside”. Every relationship is unique, and of course it may vary who is dominant and where, and one may not necessarily be dominant. But the wrong thing is to turn this into a race. The relationship should never turn into a race and a war. The important thing is to reach a common point at the end of the day and come to an agreement. Remember, relationship is an enjoyable process.
The basic expectations of both parties in a relationship are the same; love and respect. It would not be right to think that “women want more love, men want respect”. Everyone has the same expectations. Conflicts begin when these expectations are not sufficiently met.
A healthy relationship should also have a common future. This can be one year from now or 30 years from now. For example, having a child should be if it is in the common future of both parties, that is, if they are common expectations and aspirations of people. Couples should not act at this point under pressure from families to “we want grandchildren”.
One of the indicators of a good relationship is a good sex life. Because the emotional problems we experience affect our sexuality and this is reflected in the relationship. We hear clichés such as “When we get married, sexual life ends or decreases”. It is important to heed our own needs instead of approaching with these preconceptions. Of course, priorities that can change over time may not bring sexuality to the fore. The important thing is whether the couples are happy with this situation and if there is a problem, they should focus on the solution.
The best way to keep love and relationship alive is to create opportunities for ourselves. We must create opportunities to take time for ourselves, express our love, and keep the other person’s feelings alive. Remember that love is an emotion that is felt, not known.
One of the most common mistakes among couples is that when there is a problem, neither side talks about it. Instead of speaking, suggestions or behaviors aimed at getting the other party to understand are common. However, the solution is simple; contact…
Another mistake is to think that everything is over after getting married and do not compromise. The general perception that marriage takes the relationship to the highest point, it makes the relationship routine since marriage. The couples thus start to have a monotonous relationship.
When couples give birth to a child, they sometimes continue their lives solely as parents. This means that; they can forget that they are men and women. Of course, we will acquire new identities as children, but the ideal is to maintain the relationship by making balanced transitions between the roles brought by these identities.