While browsing on social media, you must have seen posts about self-care. In general, these posts are in the form of lists containing some suggestions about self-care such as take a bubble bath, drink tea, write daily or go for a walk. Mentioning such substances and recommending them in self-care conversations is actually promising, and it also provides comfort to people who try to apply them. However, less voiced in this type of conversation, The most important form of self-care is inner conversations.
If you’ve ever had therapy or studied personal growth, you’ve probably come across the concept of inner speech. Internal speech is the way one talks to oneself, as everyone guessed. Our inner conversations, which are closely related to health, either help or harm us. What we call negative self-talk usually causes stress, depression and anxiety. Alternatively, it turns out that choosing a more positive way of speaking strongly influences the way we think, feel and behave.
Making significant changes in the way you speak internally is one of the most important ways to take care of yourself, especially if you tend to speak harshly towards yourself. The first step to making your inner speech more positive and turning it into self-care is to start being aware of your thoughts. Regularly noticing how you talk to yourself. Most people are not very aware of what they are saying to them; Either he is too confused to pay attention to this issue, or he is so used to talking in this way that he cannot notice the negative effects on himself. Start by noticing what you are saying in your inner speech and how you treat yourself. Give up thoughts that aren’t helpful to you. Make your inner experience more positive by recognizing the tone you use in your inner speech.
The second step in making your inner speech more positive is taking control of your dialogues with yourself. It is true that there is a critic in everyone, and this critic can be quite cruel and hard-hearted. For some people, this inner critic is a tyrant who turns every minute of the day into suffering. You should realize that your inner speech has a certain rhythm, even if it is not that extreme, and that rhythm can be harsh if you are not careful.
In this context, self-care means recognizing a destructive critical conversation you have with yourself and translating it into a more positive internal narrative. If you’re having trouble understanding what it means to talk about self-care, talk to yourself the way a loving parent does. Let the messages you send to yourself be kind, encouraging, sensitive and generous. Keep your expectations realistic, accept what happened, and be more forgiving. Over time, your inner conversations will become more nourishing, improving your spiritual and sensory health. In this way, your overall health will also be supported.
Self-care is important and it is sure to benefit you by paying more attention to it. Even if you do your self-care by eating a healthy diet or resting, you should understand that you are worth it and allow yourself to make your self-care a priority. Your inner talk is the first thing that will make you stop caring about your self-care and ignoring your needs. Therefore, notice how you are talking to yourself and start caring about yourself.
Translated from the original English: Dilara Preserve
Kaynak: Psychology Today. Fournier, Denise. Why a Shift in Self-Talk Is the Ultimate Self-Cae Strategy. Şuradan alındı: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/mindfully-present-fully-alive/201901/why-shift-in-self-talk-is-the-ultimate-self-care-strategy